We dread going to funerals. Who doesn’t, right? Whether it’s our family member or friend, a funeral is a final farewell; a goodbye, but never seeing each other again. It’s dreadful, gloomy, sad, and painful.
But what could be more painful than a funeral? It is more painful when someone dies, yet no one is there during the funeral service. Some people live alone, have no more living family members, or are forgotten.
Jeane Trend-Hill knew how painful the death of a loved one could be, but it made her sadder to see someone cremated or buried alone. So, she thought of one unique way to give back: attending a stranger’s funeral.
Death as an Old Friend
Most of us would think of death as something to be feared or traumatizing. But for Jeane-Trend Hill, death has become an old friend since she faced a couple of painful ones while she was young. She lost her father, Joe (56), at 14 and her mother, Mary (57), when she was 20.
Jeane found the topic of death, funerals, and cemeteries intriguing as she grew older. She would spend a few hours drawing or taking photos of Victorian cemeteries in London. But how did she start going to a stranger’s funeral?
Funeral by Accident
The first time Jeane attended a stranger’s funeral was in 2012, and it happened by accident. She walked into a church and realized a funeral service was going on. Her religious belief told her to stay behind. Even if it was a stranger’s funeral, she was moved.
A few weeks later, a cemetery worker contacted her and asked if she’d like to attend a veteran’s funeral. He said no one was there to pay respects, so she went along. Since then, she’s been to more than 200 stranger’s funerals worldwide.
No one Should be Buried Alone
Upon knowing what Jeane did, cemetery workers often requested her to attend the funerals of those with no relatives. She never said ‘no’ because she believed no one should be put to rest alone.
“I realized that everyone has a story to tell. Everyone has lived a life and should have someone around to remember them when they die. No one should ever be cremated or buried alone,” she said.
Jeane’s been to different funerals across the world. Even if she went to places where she wasn’t meant to attend funerals, she still checked the nearest crematory or cemetery and looked around.
A Way of Giving Back
Jeane does not only attend funerals of those without relatives. She spends time cleaning and maintaining cemeteries. Her fascination made her appreciate life after death. Further, she earned her Doctorate in Mortuary Science, which allowed her to work as a cemetery historian.
For Jeane, this is her way of giving back to others in need – even if that “others” have passed already.
“Death has never worried me. I just hope I can make death feel less scary for people. It’s my way of giving something back,” she said in an interview.
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