The COVID-19 pandemic was a tough time for many of us. It meant quarantining ourselves away from the world and missing out on some much-needed human interaction. Well, one person found a way to keep that socialization going while still remaining socially distant–and he added some all-important comedy to help his neighborhood through a hard time.
Check out this list of 30 dad jokes that one neighbor put out into his yard every day and be sure to share it with a friend!
1. Dad Bod
Lots of people like to poke fun at men once they become a dad. Usually, their once young and trim bodies turn a bit flabby after they hit fatherhood. However, this dad found a way around this problem… without even having to work out.
2. No Hands
The best part about a good dad joke is that they aren’t even that funny. They tend to be a bit dumb and just clever enough to elicit a laugh. This is a perfect example.
3. Turned Around
Okay, this one actually had me laughing. I’ve heard this song a thousand times and never once thought to turn it into a joke. Well done, dad. Well done.
4. Looking Sharp
This one takes just a bit of fish knowledge. Both swordfish and marlin have long, sharp, pointed barbs on the ends of their faces. And if they could talk, I imagine this is exactly what they’d say to each other.
5. Slippery
The best jokes are the ones that don’t take any explanation. Although this one is simple, it lands perfectly. I’ll be putting this one into my joke bag.
6. Running Away
A good dad is one that makes their children laugh… at least until they become teenagers. After that, it gets a bit harder. I’m sure this joke got some laughs out of the kids when they were still young enough to appreciate it.
7. Water
When writing a joke, it’s all about being clever. That’s exactly what’s going on here. Clever, simple, and funny–the perfect joke.
8. Beef Stew
After you read enough of these jokes, you wonder who came up with them all. It seems like there is an unlimited amount of clever ways to take a simple idea and make it hilarious. This is one of those jokes.
9. Puns
Puns… either you love them or you hate them. Those that love them will appreciate this one. I’m sure they are plenty used to the groans that come from their never-ending puns.
10. One Letter
This one makes you think a bit if you don’t look at the answer right away. I spent a good five minutes trying to figure it out but couldn’t. I call that a successful joke.
11. Pirate Corn
Pirates are awesome, and there have been countless jokes made about them. This one is great if only for its imagery. I’d love to see a land-locked pirate selling corn.
12. Coffee Mugged
I never realized how rough of a life coffee has, it literally gets mugged every single day. Except for those days that it gets thermos-ed. That’s a good day for coffee.
13. Vegan Fight
This one is both funny and intriguing. I don’t think you could call a fight between vegans a beef. However, according to the slang dictionary, a beef is in fact a fight. The world may never know the answer to this one.
14. Happy Mother’s Day
Moms do so much for us and we still poke fun at them. To all the moms out there, thanks for all that you do. You deserve more than one day a year.
15. Spring
What’s better than the first day of spring? The weather gets warmer, the coats go back in the closet, and people start emerging from their homes. And yes, they also wet their plants…
16. Sharks
I like a joke that makes me think a bit. This is one of those jokes right here. It held that perfect balance of not being obvious, but still being funny once you get it.
17. Huge Waist
A good pun utilizes the many different spellings and meanings of the same word. I rarely mistake waste and waist, but in this instance, I’m glad that I did.
18. Chicken Jokes
The chicken joke is a classic. I’m not sure why it has lasted so long but I’m glad that people are still riffing on it. This may be my favorite rendition of it.
19. Foil Again
Alright, sometimes dad jokes can be a bit of a stretch. However, since they are dad jokes, they can be stretched much further than normal jokes and still be funny. This is one right here.
20. Squats
Here’s a nod to that dad-bod joke we saw earlier. If I were funnier, I would find a way to meld these two jokes together and make one hilarious dad joke. Maybe once I have a kid or two I’ll find my dad-joke funny-bone.
21. Recliner Jokes
The best dad jokes are the ones that reference things that dads do all of the time. One of the hallmark things that dads do is sit in their recliner and watch the game. This may be my favorite joke thus far.
22. Haven’t Heard
This is one of those dad jokes that poke fun at the fact that they are getting older. It’s a good way to keep the anxiety out of aging. Just laugh when you are worried.
23. I Will Find You
Again, we get into the aging jokes. This one is extra clever because of the double use of the word “contacts.” Both human contacts and prescription contacts will help you track down a thief.
24. Easter Jokes
Landing a good pun is all about timing. This joke wouldn’t really be funny on any other day. But if dad busts it out while the kids are searching around the lawn, it becomes hilarious.
25. Deodorant
We’ve all got that friend. You know, the one who smells awful most of the time but you just don’t have the heart to tell them. And if you don’t have one of those friends, then it’s probably you.
26. Receding Hairline
I’m telling you, aging jokes will always land if you are a dad. There’s no better way to deal with that anxiety than by laughing about it. If you can show others that you are comfortable with yourself, then they will be comfortable with you, too.
27. Rock, Paper, Scissors
We all know this game, but I doubt anyone has ever played it after getting pulled over by the cops. Now that I’ve heard this joke, I’m hoping I get pulled over just once to hear the police say this to me. I have to try it.
28. Too Real
This joke is great because it is so true. Although my sock isn’t usually sliding down within my shoe, I definitely walk around while hiding problems inside myself. Once again, laughter is the best medicine here.
29. Gathering Dust
You know, I never realized how productive vacuums really are. Whether they are working or not, they are still doing their job.
30. Too True
Rarely do you realize how vulnerable you really are while living inside of your own house. That thing that you stick into your mouth every morning and night is just sitting there, waiting to be tampered with. This truly is a great lesson in kindness.
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