Since she was born on January 17, 1922, Betty White took the world by storm. With a career that spanned decades, she made us all laugh, cry, and then bring us back to laughing again. After her passing on December 31, 2021, we were all heartbroken by the news. She will never be replaced but she will always be remembered as one of the funniest and most charming people on the planet.
Here are 14 of Betty White’s all-time funniest quotes
Her smile will forever live in our hearts.
1. Betty White really cares
“Well I love Snickers and I thought, ‘Sure that’d be fun, why not [participate in the commercial for it]?’ So I got over there early one morning and didn’t know I was going to be in the… ice cold muddy water, but all I had to do was just lie down in it. This poor stunt woman took the dive, she went in. And it was a great stunt that she did, and I got the laugh. Now, really, that’s unfair when that happens. She’s probably sticking pins in a little Betty White doll.”
2. Aging gracefully
“It’s not a surprise, we knew it was coming—make the most of it. So you may not be as fast on your feet, and the image in your mirror may be a little disappointing, but if you are still functioning and not in pain, gratitude should be the name of the game.”
3. Older men are attractive
“I’ve always liked older men. They’re just more attractive to me. Of course, at my age there aren’t that many left!”
4. White, the wise and witty
“If the guy’s a cutie, you’ve got to tap that booty.”
5. She’s not exactly a kitchen person
“I go out to the kitchen to feed the dog, but that’s about as much cooking as I do.”
6. White does have hobbies
“Vodka’s kind of a hobby.”
7. Her wisdom comes naturally
“All creatures must learn to coexist. That’s why the brown bear and the field mouse can share their lives in harmony. Of course, they can’t mate or the mice would explode.”
8. Betty White is a generous lady
“Nothing better than sharing a drink with a fan – if you see me out at the club, just tell the bartender to put it on my tab #DrinksAreOnMe”
Nothing better than sharing a drink with a fan – if you see me out at the club, just tell the bartender to put it on my tab #DrinksAreOnMe
— Betty White (@BettyMWhite) July 13, 2016
9. Old school is still cool
“If you’re walking with your lady on the sidewalk, I still like to see a man walking street-side, to protect the lady from traffic. I grew up with that, and I hate to see something like that get lost. I still like to see that a man opens the door. I like those touches of chivalry that are fast disappearing. If I sound old-fashioned, it’s because I’m as old as I am! But it’s just polite.”
10. The secret to her long life
“I’m a health nut. My favorite food is hot dogs with French fries. And my exercise: I have a two-story house and a very bad memory, so I’m up and down those stairs.”
11. Dirty jokes are earned according to her
“Well, I mean, if a joke or humor is bawdy, it’s got to be funny enough to warrant it. You can’t just have it bawdy or dirty just for the sake of being that – it’s got to be funny.”
12. White’s got a different take on being “manly”
“[It’s strange that] some people say, ‘Grow some balls.’ Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding.”
13. White’s got it right
“I don’t care who anybody sleeps with. If a couple has been together all that time (and there are gay relationships that are more solid than some heterosexual ones) I think it’s fine if they want to get married. I don’t know how people can get so anti-something. Mind your own business, take care of your affairs, and don’t worry about other people so much.”
14. White is gracious, humble, and a true star
“I am still to this day star struck. I look out at this audience and I see so many famous faces, but what really boggles my mind is that I actually know many of you. And I’ve worked with quite a few… maybe had a couple… and you know who you are.”
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